It's the sort of question I'd love to see addressed in a fic, but without any character bashing, which might be a tall order at this point.

Needle/haystack ;o)
If you find one, please share? At the moment I'm mostly staying away from post-ep McShep fics because I've seen enough Keller-bashing to become somewhat distrustful. But I'd love to read fic that deals with this triangle without resorting to character bashing.